Background: 13 Years in Canada Building a Life

Amisha's journey to Canada began in 2013 when she moved for a Hospitality Management career - not a Master's degree, but hands-on experience in the hospitality industry. Over the next 13 years, she built a successful career and life across three Canadian cities, each offering different experiences and challenges.

Her Canadian Timeline:

  • 2013-2017 (Toronto): 4 years establishing her career foundation in hospitality management
  • 2017-2019 (Vancouver): 2 years where she met and married her husband, who had no desire to return to India
  • 2019-2024 (Ottawa): 7 years working in various Hilton properties in management positions

Throughout this period, Amisha worked her way up through different hospitality properties, gaining valuable international experience and management expertise. However, her husband made it clear from the beginning: he had no intention of ever returning to India. This situation is more common than you might think - many NRI couples face disagreements about returning to India, and spouse alignment is one of the most critical factors for a successful return.

Why She Always Wanted to Return to India

Despite building a successful career and comfortable life in Canada, Amisha never lost her connection to India. Her desire to return wasn't impulsive - it was a carefully considered plan that she had been working toward for years.

  • Emotional connection: She always had a special place in her heart for India and her roots
  • Career strategy: Her plan was to gain international experience, reach a management level, and then return to apply that expertise in India
  • Personal sacrifice: She made the difficult decision to marry her husband despite his firm stance against returning to India
  • Regular visits: She visited India every 1-2 years to maintain her connection with family and culture, though her husband never came after their 2017 wedding

This created an interesting dynamic in their marriage - Amisha was always planning for a return while her husband was equally determined to stay in Canada permanently. Yet she didn't let his resistance stop her from pursuing what she believed was right for her future.

The Challenges That Made Her Reconsider Staying in Canada

By 2023, after 13 years in Canada, Amisha began to feel the weight of living away from her roots. The post-COVID reality brought several challenges that made her question whether Canada was still the right place for her.

Emotional and Social Challenges:

  • Sense of belonging: Life felt increasingly empty despite professional success - she was missing a deeper sense of belonging
  • Social isolation: Friends moved away and social gatherings stopped, leaving her feeling disconnected
  • Workplace dynamics: As the only Indian in her properties, she often felt left out of colleague gatherings and social events
  • Subtle discrimination: Ottawa, unlike Toronto or Vancouver, had more noticeable instances of silent racism that affected her daily experience

Practical Challenges:

  • Winter fatigue: The harsh Canadian winters started bothering both her and her husband more than before
  • Financial reality: Despite both being successful in their careers, they were struggling to save money - the cost of living was eating into their income
  • Quality of life: She realized that financial success wasn't translating into the quality of life she wanted

These challenges combined to create a turning point. Amisha realized that she couldn't ignore her desire to return to India any longer. The question was: how would she convince her husband? According to Wikipedia's data on NRIs, millions of Indians live abroad, and many face similar dilemmas about returning home.

The Turning Point: One Visit Changes Everything

The breakthrough came in September 2023 when Amisha's husband finally agreed to visit India after 7-8 years of refusing. This single trip became the catalyst that transformed his entire perspective on returning to India.

What Changed His Mind During That One Visit:

  • Cultural immersion: Being surrounded by his own people and culture - something he hadn't experienced in years
  • Technology advancement: He was amazed by India's digital infrastructure - QR codes, UPI payments, and modern technology everywhere
  • Healthcare efficiency: He experienced a full body checkup completed in one day with results delivered on WhatsApp - a stark contrast to Canada's healthcare wait times
  • Hospitality and accessibility: The ease of getting things done, the availability of services, and the hospitality of people impressed him
  • Stress relief: He felt the stress factor just disappear - the pace of life, the warmth of people, and the sense of community were therapeutic
"He went bonkers. Within a zippy, the dude changed his mind completely. Now even if I change my mind, he won't."

This transformation shows how powerful a real experience can be compared to assumptions and fears. What he had imagined about India for years was completely different from the reality he experienced. One visit was enough to shift his entire perspective. This pattern is common - as we've seen in stories of couples navigating immigration challenges and return decisions, firsthand experience often trumps years of discussion.

Her Move to Ahmedabad: Career Success Within Weeks

With her husband's newfound enthusiasm for returning to India, Amisha moved forward with her plan. What's remarkable about her career transition is how quickly she secured a position - within just 2 weeks of moving to Ahmedabad, she had landed a management position at Adani Corporation.

Her Career Strategy:

  • Early networking: 6 months before her move, she started reaching out to hospitality professionals on LinkedIn
  • International advantage: Her 13 years of international experience in hospitality management was highly respected by Indian companies
  • Competitive edge: Companies were eager to hire someone with her level of international experience and management expertise
  • Quick placement: Within 2 weeks of moving, she had secured a management position - a testament to how valued international experience is in India

This demonstrates an important point for anyone considering returning to India: international experience is a significant asset. Indian companies actively seek professionals who have worked abroad and can bring global best practices to their organizations. If you're planning a similar career transition, understanding how professionals build careers after returning to India can provide valuable insights.

Financial Planning: How They Made the Decision

One of the key factors that helped convince Amisha's husband was detailed financial planning. He created a comprehensive spreadsheet comparing every expense between Canada and India, which helped make the decision more concrete and less emotional.

His Detailed Comparison Included:

  • Grocery costs: Comparing prices of everyday items like onions, milk, and other household staples
  • Household help: The cost of domestic help in India vs. Canada
  • Housing and transportation: Rent, car payments, and insurance costs in both countries
  • Social expenses: Wedding and birthday celebration costs
  • Vacation planning: They budgeted for 2 trips per year minimum to maintain their lifestyle
  • Lifestyle quality: He calculated the cost of maintaining a luxurious lifestyle in India

The spreadsheet revealed something important: they could maintain a higher quality of life in India with lower expenses. This financial reality, combined with the emotional benefits of being closer to family and culture, made the decision clear. For those considering retirement in India after years abroad, the 50/50 savings rule (spend half, save half) is a proven strategy that ensures financial security.

Setting Boundaries with Family: The Most Important Step

One of Amisha's most important pieces of advice for couples returning to India is setting clear boundaries with extended family before the move. This is often overlooked but crucial for maintaining independence and marital harmony.

"Family is reason you come back, but you have to have boundaries. When it comes to decisions and lifestyle, no one has say except me and him."

How She Communicated Boundaries with Her Family:

  • Clear message: "We want to live with you and spend time together"
  • Independence: "But our lifestyle decisions are ours alone"
  • Autonomy: "We'll ask for guidance when we need it"
  • Confidence: "Trust us - we managed well abroad without you"

This boundary-setting is essential because returning to India often means living closer to extended family, which can create pressure to conform to their expectations. Amisha's approach was respectful but firm - she valued family but wouldn't compromise on her independence.

Life in India Now: The Reality After the Move

After moving to Ahmedabad, Amisha has experienced a dramatic improvement in her quality of life. The benefits go far beyond financial savings - they're deeply personal and emotional.

  • Mental well-being: She's mentally very happy - a significant shift from the emptiness she felt in Canada
  • Social connections: She's meeting friends for coffee regularly - something she cried for in Canada but couldn't achieve
  • Community: She receives birthday invites and family members drop by - the spontaneous social interactions she missed
  • Family time: She's seeing her aging mother daily - a precious opportunity she couldn't have from Canada
  • Lifestyle: She's no longer living like a machine - the pace of life allows for genuine relaxation and enjoyment

These benefits highlight why many people return to India despite the challenges. It's not just about career or money - it's about reclaiming a sense of belonging and living a life that feels authentic to who they are.

Advice for Others Considering Similar Moves

Based on her experience, Amisha offers practical advice for different groups of people considering their own return journey.

For Students Considering Going Abroad

Amisha's advice is clear: Definitely go abroad at least once in your life. Here's why:

  • You learn independence and self-reliance that you can't gain at home
  • You develop financial management skills by handling your own expenses
  • You gain international work experience that's valued everywhere
  • You build confidence by overcoming challenges in a foreign environment

For Couples Navigating Return Decisions

Amisha's key advice for couples is practical and compassionate:

  • Don't push your partner: Let the desire to return come naturally - forcing it creates resentment
  • Do detailed research together: Create financial comparisons and lifestyle analyses like Amisha's husband did
  • Consider trade-offs: Discuss which cons you're okay living with - no place is perfect
  • Set boundaries early: Establish family boundaries before moving to protect your independence
  • Trust your decision: Remember that you can always go back if it doesn't work out

The Most Important Message

"Don't stay in dilemma. Coming back to your own people can never be wrong decision."

This statement encapsulates Amisha's philosophy. She didn't let her husband's initial resistance stop her from pursuing what she believed was right. She moved forward with her plan, and ultimately, he came around. The key is not to get stuck in indecision - make a choice and commit to it.

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Key Takeaways for Your Journey

Step 1: Make Your Decision

Don't stay in dilemma. If you feel called to return to India, trust that feeling and make a decision.

Step 2: Do Financial Planning

Create detailed comparisons of cost of living to make the decision concrete and help convince reluctant partners.

Step 3: Secure Employment

Start networking 6 months before your move. International experience is highly valued in India.

Step 4: Set Family Boundaries

Communicate clearly with your family about your independence and lifestyle choices before moving.

Step 5: Invite Your Spouse to Visit

If your spouse is reluctant, one real experience in India can change their perspective completely.

Spouse Not On Board? You're Not Alone

Join our Inner Circle community to connect with others navigating similar situations, share experiences, and get support from people who understand your journey. Get real insights from people who've made the move and are thriving in India.

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