🌍 Background: From UK to US to India
Gayatri's journey follows a path familiar to many NRIs - marriage, relocation, and the constant pull between two worlds. She got married and within 6 months, her husband (working for Deloitte) got an opportunity to move abroad.
The Journey Timeline
- UK (1.5-2 years): Lived in central London, used public transport, traveled across Europe every weekend
- US (~10 years): Moved to Seattle, bigger home, owned a car, started family
- India (10 years): Moved in 2015 when elder son was completing grade 4
- US 2.0 (Current): Moved back on L1 visa for husband's AI opportunity
What makes Gayatri's story unique is that she always had "one foot in India." She delivered both her children in India while living in the US - traveling in her sixth month of pregnancy, then bringing the babies back at 3 months and 5 months old respectively.
📚 Why Gayatri Homeschooled in the US
Before understanding her move to India, it's crucial to understand why Gayatri pulled her elder son out of the US public school system - a decision that shaped her entire career trajectory.
The School Challenges
- Labels: Son was labeled as "naughty" with "behavioral issues"
- Symptoms: Wouldn't stand in line, finished work faster, became fidgety
- Diagnosis limbo: Couldn't be categorized as autistic or ADHD, but wasn't "regular" either
- School response: Would seat him aside alone so he wouldn't disturb others
- Root cause: Later figured out he wasn't challenged enough
What Homeschooling Taught Her
Homeschooling became the foundation for Gayatri's future education ventures:
- Learned different curriculums and teaching methods
- Understood how to adjust challenges to the child's level
- Increased physical activity and stimulation
- Joined homeschooling groups for social interaction
- Enrolled son in pottery and other classes for formal classroom exposure
The biggest advantage? Her son learned to interact with all age groups - not just his peers. "He can interact and play with younger kids. He can talk to older children. He can play with older children."
💡 The Strong WHY Behind Moving to India
Gayatri emphasizes that the "WHY" behind any move must be crystal clear. Her reasons were deeply personal and non-negotiable.
Gayatri's Three Core Reasons
- Belongingness: "I always felt I'm an Indian. I will be recognized always as an Indian. Even if I get my US citizenship, people are going to recognize me as an Indian. I will never become an American."
- Family: Wanted kids to have extended family - close to both sets of grandparents in Bangalore
- H4 Visa Restrictions: At that time, H4 visa holders were not allowed to work. She wanted to explore opportunities.
The Timing Decision
They chose to move when the elder son was completing grade 4 because:
- Higher grades would make transition to Indian education harder
- Younger son was just stepping into school - why expose him to American system then change?
- Their Bangalore house was getting possession that year
- Everything was falling into place
📋 Planning the Move: Logistics and Career
The Shipping Strategy
Gayatri took an entire container from US to India. Her reasoning was practical:
Why Ship Everything?
- Already knew where to buy what in the US - no homework needed
- Husband did financial analysis comparing furniture costs in India vs shipping
- Had 6-9 months to plan - bought furniture, used it, then shipped (showed as "6 months old" to customs)
- Kept all bills ready for customs clearance
- Created a small library for kids - collected books from thrift stores, library sales, garage sales
Career Planning
The family took a strategic approach:
- Gayatri: Moved first with kids to Bangalore (sister lived there for support)
- Husband: Stayed back in US until he found a job in India - took about a year
- Job search: Husband's company (boutique consulting in Seattle) had no India presence, so he had to find a new company
- Process: Traveled once for interview, got offer, resigned, then moved
🏫 IB vs CBSE: Why She Made the Switch
Like many NRI families, Gayatri initially fell for the "IB is the curriculum to go for" myth. Within a year, she switched to CBSE.
Why She Left IB
- Target audience: IB is more suited for kids who want to settle abroad - most IB kids were talking about going abroad for undergrad
- Social environment: IB school kids were more affluent and luxurious
- Uncertainty: At grade 5, they weren't sure if kids would go to US or Indian colleges
Why CBSE Won
- Flexibility: Opens doors for both Indian universities AND abroad - no university will stop a child taking SAT
- Cost: IB costs 6-7 lakhs/year for middle school, 12 lakhs for high school. With two kids, that's 25 lakhs/year just for school
- Proof: Neighbor's son finished CBSE and was in US - a data point that it works
Bridging the Gap
Gayatri acknowledged knowledge gaps between IB and CBSE. Their solution? Strategic extracurriculars:
- Sports and music outside school
- Communication program for a year
- Toastmasters and public speaking sessions
- Leveraged metro city options for kids
Result: Elder son completed till grade 12 in CBSE, wrote Indian competitive exams, and got into BITS Pilani - one of India's top engineering colleges.
📝 How Her Son Conquered Hindi in 2 Years
One of the biggest fears for NRI parents is the language requirement. Gayatri's son went from zero Hindi to passing board exams.
The Strategy That Worked
- One-on-one tutor: Not group sessions - tutor could work at child's pace
- Start from basics: Began with barakhadi (alphabet), finished in 3 months
- Timeline: Covered LKG to grade 6 Hindi in two years
- Exam strategy: Worked closely with teacher on how to attempt papers
The Exam Hack
For the 100-mark Hindi paper:
- 20 marks internals: Aim for 16-17 (easier to secure)
- 40 marks grammar: Easier than theory
- 40 marks theory: Teacher taught him to copy half the question and write answer - at least half a mark instead of zero
- Multiple halves: Add up to 4-5 marks
Pro tip: "Even if you have an iota of idea that you're moving to India, get them started with Hindi. Having another language is always good for brain development and gives emotional attachment to the country."
🇮🇳 Life in India: The Beautiful Transformation
Gayatri's description of life in India is overwhelmingly positive - a stark contrast to the struggles many NRIs fear.
What Changed
- Support system: House help, family nearby, everything taken care of
- Parenting shift: When kids spilled water, first thought wasn't "I have to clean this" - could ask auntie to help
- Calmer parenting: Spent more quality time with children
- Extended family: Both sets of grandparents visiting regularly
- Kids' freedom: Could walk out and play without organizing playdates
The Conscious Decision
One powerful insight: Gayatri and her husband consciously decided never to say anything negative about India in front of the kids.
Instead, they focused on excitement: "Come on, let's run and go play outside!" The kids absorbed that positivity.
💼 From Mother to Entrepreneur: Building Two Ventures
Gayatri's entrepreneurial journey is a testament to turning motherhood challenges into business opportunities.
Buzzing Bees - Education Consulting
- Started as a phonics teacher
- Grew into education consulting company
- Worked with schools on teacher training and curriculum enhancement
- Conducted workshops for 3,500+ families
- Got certified as a parent coach
Literacy Bees - Incubated at IIM Bangalore
- Born from teaching her son to read (he struggled with reading)
- Phonics, spelling rules, comprehension, writing curriculum
- Pitched to IIM Bangalore and got incubated
- Own workbooks for English enrichment
- Board games launching soon
- Recognized by Startup India
The key enabler? No visa restrictions. "When you don't have constraints, when you don't have restrictions in your head, you move forward very freely with a free thought."
⚠️ The Struggles: Traffic, Finances, and Adjustments
Gayatri is honest about the challenges - it wasn't all smooth sailing.
The Real Struggles
- Traffic: Kids got frustrated, nauseated in closed car for long times
- Startup challenges: No big corporate names on resume - "I'm just a mother"
- Work culture: Husband faced different work culture, long hours
- Finances: "Sometimes it felt like what you're saving is what you're earning"
- Housing: From single family home in US to apartment in India
- Kids waiting: Would stand near park forever waiting for turn - never got it
How They Coped
- Traffic solution: Created "busy corner" in car with art, craft, books, games
- Planning: Avoided malls on weekends, used flexible hours
- Park waiting: Kids learned to read while waiting - diverted energy from frustration
- Empathy over complaints: "Huh, it feels bad right? I know you stood in line for a long time. So what else can we do?"
✈️ Why Move Back to US After 10 Years?
After a decade of thriving in India, the family made the unexpected decision to return to the US.
The Three Triggers
- Elder son's JEE journey: Saw how rigorous, competitive, and anxious the journey was - though he made it to BITS Pilani
- Younger son's path: Didn't want traditional engineering/medical - wanted to build robotics. India is still evolving for non-conventional paths.
- Husband's opportunity: AI innovation role during the AI boom - company wanted him to move
Elder son also mentioned wanting to go to US for masters after undergrad. Both kids seemed headed toward the US.
Gayatri's Personal WHY
She needed her own reason beyond family:
Her solution: Enrolled in Dr. Shefali's conscious parenting certification program - a 1.5 year program to make use of her time in the US.
Immigration status: Moved on L1 visa (husband's intra-company transfer).
🎓 Younger Son's Adjustment to US High School
The younger son, who did most of his schooling in India, had a mixed experience adjusting to US high school.
What Worked
- Academics: "Very happy because it's very easy" - India's academic rigor is much higher
- Cultural awareness: Thanks to YouTube and media, he knew American culture, shows, and what kids talk about
The Challenge: Friendships
- India friendships: Very strong, deep relationships
- US friendships: More surface level, competitive, people don't share much
- Example: In India, even during JEE prep (one of world's toughest exams), friends exchanged notes, studied together, shared question papers from different coaching centers
💡 Advice for NRI Families
Gayatri's advice comes from living both journeys - US to India and India to US.
For Those Moving to India
- Don't go by popular opinions: Do your own research on schools, cities, everything
- Work on your WHY first: If that's clear, everything falls into place
- It's okay to change schools: What works for one child may not work for another - her two kids never went to the same school
- All schools are good: Don't chase "the best" - see what works for YOUR child
- Never speak negatively about India: Kids absorb your emotions
- Choose a good gated community: Safety, convenience, kids can play freely
For Those Moving Due to Visa Constraints
- Embrace the change: What's in your control, change. What's not, accept.
- Don't transfer negativity: Kids didn't ask to be brought to US or taken back to India
- Accept first: "The change happened only when I accepted - yes, I moved. But what now?"
- Find your WHY: Even if move isn't your choice, find your personal reason to thrive
On Her Own US 2.0 Adjustment
Gayatri admits the reverse move was harder:
- From US to India: "Day one we were happy - eating roadside food, enjoying friends and family"
- From India to US: "Took a lot of time to even accept it. First three months was all crying."
- Women's Day contrast: In India, keynote speaking and networking. In US, washing dishes.
Her mindset shift: "I stopped comparing. I question - why am I here? What is God trying to teach me? What is the lesson I can take forward?"
❓ Frequently Asked Questions
Based on Gayatri's detailed journey, here are answers to common questions NRI families have about moving between US and India with children.
