Why I Moved Back to India as an NRI After 14 Years | H1B Restrictions & Loneliness
Aditi spent 14 years in US on H1B, faced constant visa issues, loneliness, and mental health challenges. She shares her honest journey of moving back to India, finding convenience, pursuing passions, and how her mental health transformed overnight.
Why I Moved Back to India as an NRI After 14 Years | H1B Restrictions & Loneliness
Aditi spent 14 years in the US on H1B, faced constant visa issues, loneliness, and mental health challenges. She shares her honest journey of moving back to India, finding convenience, pursuing passions, and how her mental health transformed overnight.
Key Highlights from Aditi's Journey
- Went to US in 2010 for Masters, worked 12 years in IT
- Started having visa issues (RFEs) from 2017-2018 - prepared backup plan
- H1B limitations: Can only do one job, no side business or hustle
- Struggled with loneliness, anxiety, depression in last 3-4 years
- Couldn't attend own sister's wedding in 2020 due to travel ban
- India mutual fund investments grew 110% - more than doubled
- Moved back in 2024, taking 4-5 month sabbatical
- Mental health issues "completely disappeared the moment I came to India"
On Mental Health: "H1B is very very limiting. You can only do one job. You cannot do multiple jobs. You cannot have a side business or a side hustle. There came a point where I was feeling very anxious and very depressed. I wasn't feeling very happy or fulfilled. That kind of completely disappeared the moment I came to India."
📚 Background: Why She Went to US
Aditi went to the US for her Masters in 2010, right after her engineering degree.
Initial Motivations
- Career opportunity: India was just getting into IT space, but most opportunities were in US
- Exploration: "I've always been an explorer - I needed to get out and see how life is in the Western world"
- Tech career: Wanted to build a stellar career in tech industry
The exposure she got in the US was "outstanding and amazing" - meeting people from different backgrounds, learning new technical skills, experiencing different cultures.
🔒 H1B Frustrations: The Breaking Point
The visa situation became a major factor in Aditi's decision to leave.
The Visa Reality
- RFEs everywhere: Getting RFEs for literally everything - extensions, i140
- Uncertainty: "It struck me that my life in US might not be permanent - it can end anytime"
- Green card wait: "I have like a 25-30 year wait to get my green card. Probably I'll retire after that."
H1B Limitations
"H1B is very very limiting. You can only do one job. You cannot do multiple jobs. You cannot have a side business or a side hustle. You're just limited to doing one job. I wanted to explore entrepreneurship and other things on the side that I wasn't able to in US."
The Final Triggers (2023-2024)
What Pushed the Decision
- People around her getting laid off
- US economy not doing great
- Constant pressure of potential layoff
- Visa uncertainty adding to stress
- India's growth story becoming more compelling
🧠 Mental Health: The Hidden Struggle
Aditi is candid about the mental health challenges she faced - something many NRIs don't talk about.
The Struggles
- Loneliness: Doing everything on her own
- Shrinking social circle: Friends getting married, having kids, moving away
- Anxiety: About visa status and potential layoffs
- Depression: From being away from family
- Isolation: "I used to live in a community where I hardly even knew my neighbors"
Missing Family Milestones
"There was a time in 2020 during COVID - I could not even attend my own sister's wedding because of travel ban, then not getting appointments for stamping. I have just missed out on so many important family milestones and events."
The Cultural Difference
Individualistic vs Community-Based
| US (Individualistic) | India (Community-Based) |
|---|---|
| Hardly knew neighbors | Neighbors come over and talk |
| Doing everything alone | Always surrounded by people |
| Social circle shrinks over time | Extended family and old friends |
| Have to organize meetups | Spontaneous interactions |
Important Message
"If you are living in any Western country, please please focus on your mental health because at some point it's definitely going to bother you. And if you are not doing mentally well, it also affects other aspects of your life - whether it is work or personal relationships."
💰 Financial Planning: SIP Strategy
Aditi started preparing financially from 2017 when visa issues began.
Her Strategy
- Saved 30-40% of salary (advantage of being single)
- Enrolled in mutual fund SIP in India on father's suggestion
- Sent fixed amount to India every month
- Hired financial advisor in India (much cheaper than US)
- Father and she share the same advisor
The Results
110% Growth
"In early 2023, I noticed that whatever money I invested in mutual funds in India just grew 110%. I didn't have that kind of growth in US when I was investing. The money not even doubled - tripled in India. That kind of took me by surprise."
Investment Advice
- India: Needs active investment management - someone monitoring because it's a growing economy
- US: Can invest in passive funds like S&P 500 index funds
- FDs in India: Return 8-9% vs 3-4% CDs in US
- Don't let money sit: Actively invest in India - your money in 10 years will grow 4-5 times
🎁 The Sabbatical Decision
Aditi decided to gift herself something she'd never had - a break.
Sabbatical Goals
- Travel India: "I've covered 34-35 states in US but hardly seen anything in India"
- Reconnect: Close family, extended family, friends known for 20-25 years
- Explore business: Airbnb, travel entrepreneurship
- Rest: "Last couple of years was very very tough"
🇮🇳 Life in India: The Transformation
Aditi's experience in India has been overwhelmingly positive.
What She Loves
- Convenience: Domestic help available and affordable
- Transport: Uber, Ola, Rapido, e-autos, Metro - amazing connectivity
- Food: Available 24/7 - can get juice and breakfast at 7:30 AM from street vendors
- Time freedom: Household work taken care of, can focus on other things
- Social life: Never lonely, always surrounded by people
Nagpur's Transformation
US vs India Comparison
| Aspect | US (Raleigh) | India (Nagpur) |
|---|---|---|
| Daily activity | Not much happening | Busy every day, something to do |
| Food availability | Everything closes at 9 PM | Available 24/7 |
| Household work | Do everything yourself | Domestic help available |
| Transport | Need own car | Multiple options even without driving |
⚠️ Challenges in India
Aditi is honest about the challenges she's encountered.
Process Challenges
- Slower processes: Getting driver's license takes multiple days vs quick in US
- Red tape: Have to go through multiple people
- Business setup: Licenses take 1-3 months (vs just checking city website in US)
- Jugaad culture: Sometimes need to pay extra (bribes) to get things done
🚀 New Pursuits: Airbnb, Travel, Freelancing
Aditi is exploring multiple passions she couldn't pursue on H1B.
Current Activities
- Airbnb research: Learned the business in US, now researching best Indian cities for investment
- Travel entrepreneurship: Recently got into this space
- IT consulting freelancing: Just 3-4 hours a day for work-life balance
- Job search: Started looking but not in a hurry
💡 Advice for NRIs
For Families
- Plan 1-2 years in advance
- Decide: internal transfer or take a break?
- Figure out city and school for kids
- Prepare kids mentally one year in advance
- Ensure financial stability for at least one year without job
For Single People
- It's much easier - only need to take care of yourself
- 3-4 months is enough to wrap up
- Take a sabbatical if you can
- Travel the world, travel India, experience the grassroots
- It will broaden your horizon and change your life
Most Important Advice
"Focus on your mental health. When we live in a different country away from our families, we don't tend to talk about mental health. If you are not doing mentally well, it affects other aspects of your life - whether it is work or personal relationships."
❓ Frequently Asked Questions
Can H1B visa holders do side business in US?
No. According to Aditi, H1B is very limiting - you can only do one job. You cannot do multiple jobs, have a side business, or a side hustle. This was one of her main frustrations that led to moving back to India.
How long is the green card wait for Indians on H1B?
Aditi mentioned a 25-30 year wait for green card. She said: "Probably I'll retire after that I'll get my green card." This uncertainty was a major factor in her decision to return.
Is it easier for single people to move back to India?
Yes, according to Aditi. Single people only need to take care of themselves, and 3-4 months is enough to wrap everything up. Families need 1-2 years of planning for kids' schools, spouse's career, etc.
How much should NRIs invest in India?
Aditi recommends actively investing in India's growing market. She saved 30-40% of her salary and sent a fixed amount monthly to India for SIP investments. Her investments grew 110% - more than doubled. She suggests hiring a financial advisor in India (much cheaper than US) for active management.
Feeling the H1B Frustration?
Aditi's story shows that moving back to India can transform not just your career options but your mental health and quality of life. Connect with others who understand the journey.
Your mental health matters. Connect with a community that understands.
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